Credit: Pixabay/CC0 Public Domain
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Credit: Pixabay/CC0 Public Domain
Would you rather be alone in the woods with a bear or with a man? This is the question currently dividing social media. According to online responses, most women who answered the question said they would choose a bear, but the decision has come as a shock to many men.
The reactions show that some men don’t understand what women are going through. The argument that women prefer bear encounters is based on evidence about the rates of male violence against women and on a lifetime of learning to fear and anticipate this violence. This is especially true of sexual assault, but it has nothing to do with bear encounters.
According to the World Health Organization, one in three women (approximately 736 million people worldwide) will experience sexual or physical violence by an intimate partner or a non-partner in their lifetime. He is said to have experienced violence. This number has remained largely unchanged over the past decade.
Bear attacks are not very common, with only 664 incidents worldwide over 15 years, and fatal attacks are rare. And bears tend to avoid humans, only attacking or defending their young if provoked.
This is not meant to generalize or scare all men. Women know that not all men are dangerous. But women don’t know which men to fear, only that male violence and men’s rights over women’s bodies are something to be wary of.
Victims of sexual violence are typically women, and perpetrators (including against other men) are overwhelmingly men. There are many men who have hurt women, or who could hurt them, but women have no way of knowing who it is.
Although much of the violence against women comes from men they know, the risk of being exposed to men they don’t know impacts their daily lives.
For example, research shows that women change their behavior (make certain decisions about the routes they travel and what they wear) to avoid harassment and abuse from men in public spaces. Academics like Fiona Bella-Gray refer to this as safety work.
Women’s views of men are also colored by nonviolent actions that harm them. Bear is also clearly not contributing to or supporting systemic sexism or misogyny, whereas most men do.
My research on misogynistic online groups investigated how men engage in behaviors that reinforce gender inequality against women.
Author Emma Pittman used the analogy of the human pyramid to explain this phenomenon. The choice some men make to remain silent about abuse is the bottom of a pyramid that holds back other men who tell misogynistic jokes or commit violence.
The overall effect, whether intentionally or through ignorance or indifference, is to normalize and support the behavior of male sex offenders and perpetrators of domestic violence.
This culture consists of men who stand by and do nothing about sexism, harassment, and abuse; men who make and laugh at sexist and rape jokes; men who apologize for rape and blame women for their sexual victimization; people who become aggressive when rejected; people who stalk, control, and abuse women; and rapists, sexual harassers, and murderers. This cycle of misogyny is a daily reality for women, and bears are never featured.
men on the defensive side
When men’s violence against women is brought up, men are generally surprised and even defensive. In this case, people often elicit the response, “Not all men are like that.”
#NotAllMen trended online as women took to social media to express their anger and devastation following the police killing of Sarah Everard in 2021. Meanwhile, police advised women not to walk alone at night, placing the responsibility on women to avoid violence.
This conversation is about privilege, not about acknowledging it. Many men are able to go about their daily lives without worrying about being attacked or raped, without taking any safety precautions or even having such thoughts even cross their minds. , can walk alone late at night and feel no emotions. My heart beats faster when I hear footsteps behind me.
Maybe not all men, but all women who live small lives due to the threat of violence from some men.
These conversations are an opportunity for men to understand women’s real fears and become part of the solution rather than the problem.
